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Spam spam spam spam

I was pleasantly surprised, at first, that I was getting so many more comments on my blog. They all seemed very positive, too! Albeit a bit nonspecific… “Great writing!” “I am sharing in reddit.” “Wow, I am learning a l ot on this topic.” Many of them were on rather old posts, but then if these were new readers then it wouldn’t be so odd if they were poking around the archives.

I began to get a bit suspicious when I noticed that *all* the email addresses were Gmail. Then I looked closer and saw that the “website” URLs all pointed to business websites, mostly selling motorcycle parts for some reason. I marked a couple of the more egregious of those  as spam and left others alone. Then came the flood…

Walter Siegmund, 2006 (CC BY-SA 3.0)

Suddenly there were dozens of positive comments in a single night, with varying levels of apparent literacy, pouring into long posts and short, some dating years back. All of them from Gmail users, many of them (I quit checking after a while) pointing to commercial websites. I switched on comment approval. Half a dozen more trickled in over the next hour, showing the same pattern. I spammed them, too, but… in a war of attrition, did living carbon ever wear down silicon faster than the other way around?



So I hired me a rootin’ tootin’ silicon gunslinger name of Akismet, and my spam problems are over, and I’m back to the silence of the obscure blogger. The experience made me appreciate how vulnerable are our love buttons though.

"Four and twenty elders casting their crowns before the Throne of God" by William Blake

I’m not referring so much to the positive messages the spambot was giving me; a steady pattern of content-free  sycophantic praise actually gets pretty tiresome in fairly short order. Well, unless you’re a god, in which case you’d want everyone in the universe to suck up to you all the time, and in case that wasn’t enough you might even whomp up a quartet of six-winged sycophants full of eyes inside (?) and out to repeat without stopping day or night for all eternity, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, who is, and who is coming.” (Rev. 4:8) Eternity in that specific instance might be about five minutes for me but tastes in throne room decorum plainly differ.


No, I’d actually rather have someone argue with me, because that would be a more interesting type of what I really want and love: ATTENTION!! I don’t need sucking up to, I just want someone to engage with me. I envy more established bloggers their active audiences, even to the extent of wishing I had a resident creationist troll, as long as it was one of the more articulate ones.

But please, internets, no more spambots!!


~ by BT Murtagh on January 8, 2012.

Admin, musings

4 Responses to “Spam spam spam spam”

  1. I try to comment on many of your posts. Last I checked, I am pretty much CHONSP. Of course, I didn’t do an actual chemical analysis, so there may be some Rick Deckard thing going on in my brain.

    Also, I got a couple of the sycophantic praise posts a month or so back. Mine pointed to travel sites, though.

    • You do indeed, Gdad. Thanks for your contributions!

      Weren’t the replicants also CHONSP though, just genetically designed? I always thought that was a bit of a logical hole in the plot; if you’re going to design slaves, why make them indistinguishable from citizens? They could have had blue skin and feathers instead of hair.

      • It’s been a long time since I watched the movie. I supposed I could Google it or Netflix it, but why ruin a good joke/soapbox rant with actual facts?

        Love the snow effect. We’re not getting much of that here in sunny Midwest State.

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